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i love doctors ...

Since I am a full time student again, I no longer have spiffy health benefits with vision and dental plans. This means that every time I go for a checkup, I have to pay out of pocket and then starve myself for a week to make up for the difference. This is probably why I am extra irritable when I go to the doctor and am met by incompetence. If I'm being charged an arm and a leg for an eye examination, it should at least be professional ... hmph.

Strike #1
The receptionist asked me to fill out some forms. When I returned to the counter, she asked, "Where is Prudence?" She said as if she was monologuing - you could have substituted any moral descriptors in the sentence and think you were at a Shakespearean play. "oh where is courage? where is faith? where is love?" Amazingly, I knew exactly what she was talking about. She was referring to a patient who came in before me named Prudence (not the best name I know), who coincidentally has the same last name as me.

"I'm not related to Prudence. (for my own amusement) I know not prudence."
"Oh that's weird, you two have the same last name. I have never ever seen that before. wooow ... very weird. The same last name ..."
(lady, are you psyho? you work at an asian doctor's office and when I walked in there were six asian people waiting, how can you be surprised that two people who have the same last name come in one after another? I willing to bet that this happens at least 5 times a day.)

She still had a confused look on her face as I went back to my chair. Even now I can still hear her in my head screaming, "Prudence, are you here? Prudence?"

Strike #2
When my name was finally called, I was greeted by two korean nurses who were both at least a few years younger than I was. They were both young and was probably working there for the summer, the look of inexperience was so obvious on their faces. They both liked to giggle and smile because they kept doing it over and over for the next 5 minutes when they were with me. Maybe I had something in my hair or something, I'm not sure what was so funny.

I gave my glasses to the younger girl to have it checked, she looked at me and the glasses then asked, "Are these bifocals?" I was so shocked by what she said I started laughing, followed by a string of no's. She was embarrassed and blushed a little, "I meant the progressive ones, we have to ask just to make sure." I raised my eye brows slightly and replied, "Right, of course."

The slightly older nurse asked me to sit in front of an eye machine and put my chin on the device. She then proceeded to adjust the knobs to get the scope to line up to my eye and was unsuccessful for a good three minutes. It was obvious that the scope pointing to my nose and not my eye, but she kept wondering why I couldn't see anything. Another minute passed and she started asking me questions ...

"Why is it so low?
"Do you know why this isn't working?"
"ahh why doesn't this work?"

After a few whimpers from the older one, the other girl came to her rescue. She had the bright idea of adjusting the chin rest ...
"Why don't we move your chin up higher?"
"The scope is pointing at my nose, are you sure you want to raise my chin higher?"

She pretended not to hear me and proceeded to adjust the position. About 10 seconds into executing her master plan, she realized it accomplished exactly the opposite of what she wanted.

"Hmm ... let's move it down instead."
(with my sarcastic voice) "Now that's a much better idea!"

Strike #3
The doctor was a relatively young korean doctor, he didn't have a ring on so he was probably single. I would dare say that he was good looking, maybe that's why the two young nurses loved working there so much. When he was examining my eyes, he kept leaning close to me to adjust the lenses. - which was normal. The strange thing was that he kept brushing his leg against mine. Initially, I thought he was doing it by accident. But when he kept on doing it, I started to get weirded out. Even though it wasn't a sensual kind of touch, it was still weird that a guy is rubbing his knee against mine.

"Can I adjust the chair? Your leg is rubbing against mine."
"Oh sorry."

Now that was awkward ... needless to say, I'm never going back there again.

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